Twitter the Torchwood Way
by IantojJackh
Summary: The rift is quiet and the team takes to Twitter to alleviate the boredom and Ianto is not amused by the first topic of conversation. Team fic w/ Ianto/Jack pairing.


**Title: **Twitter the Torchwood Way

**Author: **iantojjackh

**Rating: **PG for mild adult themes

**Characters:** The whole team

**Summary:** The rift is quiet and the teams takes to Twitter to alleviate the boredom and Ianto is not amused by the first topic of conversation

**Spoilers:** None

**Warnings: **None. Just typical team dynamic stuff

**Notes: **This started as a comment-fic fill (Jack's first tweet) and then expanded it to a full out banter with some encouragement when the other twitter length fics were posted. Yes, all responses fit the 140 character limit. Also, my therapist (for PT) thinks I'm insane since he saw me writing the end of this at my appointment tonight. I know the at sign is missing before the handles but that is issue. Sorry

* * *

**Twitter the Torchwood Way**

**Jack Harkness- CaptnSexy**

coffeejones Ianto where's my coffee? What's taking you so long? How does this thing work? I want to spank you. Wait! Can everyone see this?

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

CaptnSexy Yes, we can all see it. Thanks for vision of coffeejones bent over your desk with his arse in the air.

**Gwen Cooper- SweetG**

I work with a bunch of children. Yes, I'm looking at you, CaptnSexy and TheBigO. We all know what a nice arse CoffeeJones has.

**Jack Harkness- CaptnSexy**

Finally someone has an appreciation for what a fine piece of art it is. Thank you SweetG

**Gwen Cooper- SweetG**

CaptnSexy You should encourage him to wear tight jeans more often. Best arse of the universe. CaptnSexy you are so lucky to own that arse.

**Gwen Cooper- SweetG**

That last comment wasn't me. Jack? What did you do? CaptnSexy. Toshie, did you teach Jack to tweet from my account?

**Toshiko Sato- Toshie**

SweetG wasn't me. I think CoffeeJones set him up with admin control over our accounts in case of emergencies.

**Ianto Jones- CoffeeJones**

CaptnSexy is no longer available to tweet. He knows the consequences should he send one more message.

**Gwen Cooper- SweetG**

CoffeeJones what did you do to him? I've never seen Jack sulk so much before.

**Ianto Jones- CoffeeJones**

SweetG that is between me and him. I put it in terms only CaptnSexy could understand.

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

CaptnSexy should change his name to IantosBitch? He looks like a sad puppy who had his bone taken away. He needs a scratch behind the ear.

**Toshiko Sato- Toshie**

CaptnSexy looks so sad. I just want to give him a hug.

**Gwen Cooper- SweetG**

CoffeeJones Are you in the archives? If you are Jack is headed your way. Be nice to him.

**Ianto Jones- CoffeeJones**

SweetG I hear him coming. Be nice? After what he said? He's luckkjkjkhihjhjhjbjbjbjbjbhb hbvhbhbjbjbjbjbjbjbjbjbjbjbj bjbjbjbjbjbhjjhuuuhhyhh

**Toshiko Sato- Toshie**

CoffeeJones Ianto? Ianto, is everything okay?

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

The minute I hear any screaming I'm out of here.

**Gwen Cooper- SweetG**

Maybe someone should check on them.

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

Are you daft, SweetG? You know what the two of them are like when they get in these moods.

**Toshiko Sato- Toshie**

Owen's right. I kind of miss The old Ianto. The way he was before he and Jack got serious.

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

You know it's bloody unfair. I get in trouble for shagging during working hours. Those two do it and it's a normal day.

**Gwen Cooper- SweetG**

But they are both happy. Better that they are happy than miserable.

**Toshiko Sato- Toshie**

Happy suits both of them.

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

Yes, because they are both bastards when they are miserable.

**Toshiko Sato- Toshie**

Is that a bit of jealously, I hear TheBigO?

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

Yes, because it's been my life's dream to climb the Torchwood ladder by climbing the boss' ladder.

**Toshiko Sato- Toshie**

You know it's not like that with them TheBigO. Not for the last two years at least.

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

True love and all that bullocks. How could I forget?

**Gwen Cooper- SweetG**

I think it's kind of sweet.

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

You would. It's such a woman thing. SweetG & Toshie

**Toshiko Sato- Toshie**

You are such a prat TheBigO

**Gwen Cooper- SweetG**

You are such a prat TheBigO

**JonHar- IantoJack**

We agree. You are a prat TheBigO

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

We finished that conversation two hours ago. Joint account, really?

**JonHar- IantoJack**

TheBigO Your point? Two hours isn't a long time.

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

IantoJack I don't want to fathom what you two were doing for two hours. I was talking about the joint account. (1/2)

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

Tea-boy must be in a really good mood for him to let you tweet again. Spare the details since you both are still in the archives. (2/2)

**JonHar- IantoJack**

TheBigO he promised to behave. Jack just got a nice taste of what he will be missing if he says the wrong thing.

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

Still stand by the idea that Jack's new name should be IantosBitch. You are the only one who knows how to control him.

**JonHar- IantoJack**

TheBigO Just one of my many many skills. We've got some more filing to do.

**Toshiko Sato- Toshie**

*groan*

**Gwen Cooper- SweetG**

*double groan*

**Owen Harper- TheBigO**

*triple groan*


End file.
